Smile When the Shadows Fall for the Sun Will Soon Shine Again
The thing they don’t tell you about mental illness is how it sometimes lulls you into a fake sense of security before pulling the rug out from under you. This new medication (Wellbutrin) has been working wonders but then my period came and suddenly I was back in tears every five seconds, lashing out and just being irrational. Now, should I be surprised? Hormones are a crazy thing after all, and I did all the research to see if this antidepressant would actually affect my menstrual cycle (they say no). But it completely turned my whole house upside down. Mark and I were at each others’ throats, and anything he said to me was met with mistrust and aggression.
As bad as my periods have been, and they are bad, I’d never experienced such a Dr. Jeckyll/Ms. Hyde scenario before. Mark was caught like a deer in headlights and the house became a warzone. It was such a big blow to us because I’ve been making so much progress and it just spiraled me into a deeper depression.
I guess what I had to learn firsthand (which has been told to me many times) that when you’re in recovery, setbacks can and will happen.
I’m happy to report that things have more or less returned to “normal” or whatever is passing for that these days. This family has been through a lot, and yes I say this family because although most things happened directly to me, they affected everyone. As I write this, Frenchie and Mark argue about whether or not “Daddy can sit down” (that girl is so strong-willed!) and I’m sitting here, content, in front of my laptop and being able to write again as the smell of brewing coffee fills the air.
Life is good. Enjoy the little moments.
Yay! I’m all caught up on recaps. Check them out in the TV Recaps section.
Remember, I will continue recapping Orphan Black here in my blog!
It has been a shitty week. Some things happened in my family that just left me exhausted and ready to throw in the towel and then I was informed I would no longer be doing recaps at theFlounce.
Not to say it’s all over with them, now I’m going to be more of a pop-culture analyst and to be honest that sounds kind of cool, you know?
I plan on continue my OB recaps here, because I love them so and it is such an underestimated show.
I shall fight the fight!
*thanks always to http://thecloneclub.tumblr.com/ for they’re amazing gifs ❤
Goodbye, GoGoT, you were fun while you lasted.
Yep, I will no longer be doing Game of Thrones on the TV Recaps section
I will be doing Louie! Yay!
And some other shows TBA in the fall so yay.
Also, I promise I will have an actual blog post soon.
Here’s what’s going on in my household right now:
Mark walked to the kitchen singing “It’s raining men” and Francesca, sitting next to me yelled, “No, daddy,” quite angrily, “Banana!”
Hello! There are brand spankin’ new recaps both for Game of Thrones and Orphan Black!
I also spiffed up the GoGoT page a bit, so it’s easier to navigate over to the full recaps/chats at theFlounce.
Also, each Orphan Black recap has its own page and I’m working on maybe making a whole full Season One recap, but not sure if I’ll have time because I’ve been thinking of other things to write about these days. Anyway.
Look Up at the Tv Recaps menu and follow to your hearts’ content.
And leave some comments, will ya??
So I write that previous post and the following day I wake up feeling much better.
Love will make everything better
Didn’t cry once. I guess Wellbutrin is finally working?
I feel more upbeat, can concentrate more during my morning meditation, have creative thoughts coming out my ears and I just feel more like, well, me. I’m writing nonstop and have ideas for articles and maybe even short stories again! I wish I slept more, though. Gonna try and buy Melatonin this week. Anyone try it and can give me your perspective on it?
The anxiety and nightmares are still there, of course, but I like my new therapist and we’ve chosen to do CPT therapy especially because of my PTSD so hopefully that can get better soon.
What’s that saying I’m always repeating? “Smile When the Shadows Fall for the Sun Will Soon Shine Again” yet I always seem to forget it when I’m down. I need to tattoo it. No kidding.
As for The Ovarian Cyst That Will Not Die. Still There. Seeing GYN on Monday. Will demand she remove this sumbitch NOW. I can’t TAKE IT ANYMORE! It keeps GROWING! Ugh. I wish I was a man sometimes. A fabulous gay man with a magnificent sense of style and 9 inch penis. I mean, seriously, I’d be glorious.